alcohol can assist in thought, but does not provide an answer. it may be death to solution of life's ponders if not tolerated critically.

When faced with disagree-ance, sobriety may tend to psychologically agree with what may not be right. An advantage of alcohol is forgetting "Things"/entities that try to influence your frame of reason, but truly are irrelevant to it. Alcohol... CAN be a savior although the chemical solution of it remains (in truth) irrelevant to a truly focused man/human.

Everyone laughed at her joke
As if they'd never even heard it before
And maybe they were truly amused
But every word that she spoke was a bore
And maybe it's because they had seen
The previews on the TV screen
Well this part is good and that's well understood
So you should laugh if you know what I mean

But it's all relative
Even if you don't understand
Well it's all understood
Especially when you don't understand
Then it's all "just because"
Even if we don't understand
Then "lets all just believe"

Everyone knows what went down
Because the news was spread all over town
And fact is only what you believe
And fact and fiction work as a team
It's almost always fiction in the end
That content begins to bend
When context is never the same

And it's all relative
Even if we don't understand
And it's all understood
Especially when we don't understand
Then it's all "just because"
Even if we don't understand
Then lets all just believe

I was reading a book
Or maybe it was a magazine
Suggestions on where to place faith
Suggestions on what to believe
But I read somewhere
That you've got to beware
You can't believe anything you read
But the good Book is good
And that's well understood
So don't even question
If you know what I mean

But it's all relative
Even if you don't understand
Well it's all understood
Especially when you don't understand
And it's all "just because"
Even if we don't understand
Then lets all just believe

But there you go once again
You missed the point and then you point
Your fingers at me
And say that I said not to believe
I believe
I guess
I guess it's all relative

another beauty from jack johnson. i was just taken back by this song like "Wow" and felt the urge to post it.

A recap of this week past and more:

Disclaimer: this is one of those entries that's more for the 'look back on in 5 years and say oh i remember that' soooo yeah i'm not trying to impress anyone... just trying to remember i guess.

Sunday was laura's graduation party. Catching up with Matt and Andrew and them guys was pretty cool. Then after that i hung out at my house with janaye for the first time since thursday when she left for her miserable winona orientation.

Monday afternoon we got a little soccer game going at the highschool in 90 degree heat then that evening Beckman and i (reffered to as Beckman to avoid confusion with matt timm who has never been called 'timm' in his life) met at the coffee co. to begin work on this year's scavenger hunt. That operation is kind of on hold until he gets back from San Diego, but the ball is rolling.

Tuesday was a great day. Beckman, Andrew, Mitch, Trent, Sweeney and I went to Cokato for a little go-cart action. This was the first time i'd ever actually been on a go-cart track; this was the first of many firsts for me latly but i'll get to that later if you're still interested. The track was legit and once i figured out just how much you can actually give it even in the turns, the intensity and adrenaline really picked up. These carts were advertised as the fastest rental cars in the state. A side note highlight, andrew's parents basically gave him the option of shaving his mustache or death by firing squad so sadly he electrically sent his lip hairs floating into the air while at the go-cart place. (He shaved with an electric shaver there) The event was captured on video along with two of the races.

In the night Tuesday night camping lead a burgade of mountain bikers to the river and i stuck around till 2 or so hangin out. Beckman and i went on a voyage to retrieve his air soft gun from his house, he by scooter and i by mountain bike, for my use the following day.


Wendesday was airsoft at Paul's house, again a first for myself. The afternoon was peppered with the most insane paintball course i've ever witnessed, a burning brush pile that could engulf a forrest, and really getting my feet wet in something very different than what i'm used to with some really cool people. Airsoft is intense. I'm a little short on creative sentence structure right now... it's going on 2:00am n i'm a lot tired. The afternoon was great though, may buy a gun of my own. Heck i've got a birthday next saturday, why not?

That evening i worked from 4:30 to 10:00, showered up, and i was off to janaye's cabin for the night. The purpose was to try and find the star i got her for graduation...i don't know, according to the little chart thing i had from astronomy class, it should have been visible around 4:00am so we had ourselves a campfire n smores, actually told ghost stories, slept for a while, woke up, walked out side, saw that the coming day had already made it too light, and so we went back to bed. We slept off and on till about 1 in the afternoon...

So I guess it's thursday now, We went back to her house in town and played with her TEN kittens for a while, then it was time for the night's main event. This day was our 6th month anniversary, brady and anne just had their 1 year this past sunday so congrats to them. The Rocket Summer is a pretty unknown band from what i've heard from people but Janaye's a monster fan and they were playing on this day at the 7th Street Entrance which is just a small side room in the same buidling as First Avenue. So i got a couple tickets. We get there just as the opening band is wrapping up and we walked into this mini, very black room with a small little stage in the front and a floor that kind of slants down towards the stage. There was a bar-looking table where a lady was selling the t-shirts but other that it was just the floor area and a hallway to the backstage. Now i'd only heard these guys on cd and... they're punk and the lead singer sounds reeealy girly. I was kind of apprehensive before hand because this place just didn't seem like 'me'. Whatever i'm over that. meh..who's to say what's me? So they come onto the stage, they rock for a little over an hour, Janaye absolutly loves it, even more than she loved jamming to their cd on the way there, and that's about all i needed to have a good time. And the show itself was really a good time. the show ended and the lead singer, i forget his name comes out so janaye and i each get a picture with him. Bryce is his name, like lice or nice. i'm not real sure why i got a picture but why not? i'll try putting it on here. He's a little guy.



Janaye had me all jazzed up. We ate at the Hard Rock Cafe across the street afterwards which was another first for me. 4/5 just because the prices were jacked but we sat outside so the assortment of passing people more than made up for it. 5/5.

We got home and watched that amanda byrnes.. soccer movie and then silent. Both movies were actually really good. The soccer one was like a Mean Girls good and silent hill was just freaky n in depth. And that ended our day.

I've finally made it to today. Let's see... more time with janaye, coffe co. then we chilled at her cabin on the pontoon for a while. Went to work, then hung out over at matt timm's for the night.

And i don't know, that's just kind of life right now. One of my biggest irks latly and this past year was that there's just sooo many things that i feel like i've been missing out on, things that i havn't tried that seem so fun. And they're common things that an average kid would've done. And that's why i'm done with sports. I've seen all i need to see with them and my parents havn't done much to 'show me the world' and i'm too damn ready to do that on my own. i want to do as many new things as possilbe and i need time to be able to do that. For me, here's a list of new things i've done this year that i can think of:

start a band
make a move on the girl of my dreams
snowboard
get up on a wakeboard
buy my first mountain bike
drive a boat
own my own fishing pole and lure
go-cart
airsoft
attend a punk concert, or conerts in general. i made it to six this year
(Red Hot Chili Peppers, 3 Trampled by Turtles, The Killers, Rocket Summer)

The last six have all been since late spring this year. I might actually go to warped tour this year...ha who knows how that could go. There's still a few things that i havn't done that i'm holding strong to.. i have nothing against it, i just don't need it to have fun. In the words of Jack Johnson, "i've got everything i need, and everything i need is enough" Sports have just been my life, but with my natural interests..there's just so much more i want to experience outside of that 'world' almost. There's obviously an unlimited ammount of very unique and interesting people and if one can take the chance to listen, get to know them in any way, that very different lifestyle can be viewed as normal in your mind; not as something out of the ordinary, but rather just a different way to enjoy your time. Be accepting of anybody looking to enjoy their time. If they are not hurting other people with their actions, who's to say their means of fun is wrong? Who's to say you wouldn't enjoy it yourself? My theory of cliques in highschool is the coarse of people not accepting means of entertainment that others have, the weariness of trying new things, scared of being everything. I want to be able to relate to anybody, just try as much as i can.

I want to dedicate an entry to jack johnson. He's the songwriter of the week. His message is powerful in that really laid back, kind of simple life matter. He's very anti-society, but he brings the peace and rocks while doing it, ukulele and all. I dont know what more to do than recommend him if you have a gripe with the world or want to chill and let him inspire you.. i like all his songs, i'm getting jazzed up just looking at them. I'll give his song of the day to Breakdown, and Bubble Toes. Dave Matthews also rocks the place.

I must get to bed. it's 3:15am. I get to go to Josh's cabin for the first time this summer tomorrow. Should be another great day. Peace.

First off i want to tell kirsten i'm glad i was inspiring, that comment inspired me to write this entry just because my mood is quite different than that last day of school. I'm not so much negative about much anymore. High school was holding me down. It's over. Forever. Not that there's anything to be grumbling about in the summer time, but if i ever get that feeling of being upset all i'd have to do is realize taht i don't have to go back to high school anymore. And it's not so much that i don't have to go back as it is that i don't have to think about that place, that situation, that lifestyle anymore. All of that is just off of my mind, forgotten in a sense. And that's what i've been waiting to do for years. I'm long over it. The scene wasn't all bad obviously. The negativity has nothing to do with relationships with friends, just the scene of a highschool environment. So in short, I'm good.

I had orientation for Winona on monday and tuesday. my mom and i spent the night in the 80 degree dorms. Overall it went well i'd say. It was basically a lot of different speakers explaining a lot of important information but it got long. My scheudle is configured and my earliest class is 10:00am all five days of the week. I'm most excited for the astronomy class. There's something very mysterious, beautiful and captivating about the stars.

We got our shiny new laptops from the school which i don't really know how to use but it's a Mac book fresh out of the box and i'll be using it for damn near everything i'm sure.

My hall kicks tail and has everything i'll need. I was very very exciting to hear today that Janaye will be in the same hall as me. The place has a pool, weightroom, laundry room, cafeteria, game room, the works.

The campus is beautiful and the town is so much more in the summer with the bluffs being fully colored with green trees and such. They looked rather bare in the winter when i went. I'm looking forward to life.

Janaye and i went to the drive-in last night in Litchfield. I hadn't been there in years but it was a hoot. We watched oceans 13 (4/5) and 300 (5/5) after folding down the back row of seats and laying in the back of her mom's suburban. Janaye loved 300 which was a big time plus on her part. I think that place is kind of a hidden gem either with dates or just a group of your buds. $6 for two movies and the place is almost empty during the week.

Summer's been fun. It's a lot of time at Janaye's cabin which i would be a fool to complain about. Went tubing for the first time a couple days ago out there with danny. i dunno it's kind of hard to write journals nowadays because a lot of what i'd say pertains to janaye and i. I'm not saying it's like mushy gooshy stuff but you know, i mean who likes hearing everything about someone else's relationship? i dunno so i just do some that writing schtuff for my own self. I love what i have with her though, i can sure tell you that much.

Life is good and is looking to only accelerate and get better. It'd be nice seein the guys more often but with baseball, everyone's work scheudle, and everything else that goes on...people are just busy and it happens. Matt and i still have to begin our scavenger hunt.

Spose i outta be going. Enjoy yourself.

Tomorrow is the final day of classes, two finals and highschool is over. and i'm leaving with nothing but a bitter taste in my mouth like quit wasting my time, i've been over it for years, let me move on into a life that is impossible here. Thank God tomorrow is our last day. Everybody seems to be screaming to be an individual, to do their own thing...to be in charge. maybe that's just me thinking. The things i've experienced in these final monthes should be some events that i'll never forget. Prom, the baseball season, a killers concert.. i don't know. Sitting in front of the computer right here and now it all seems like it'll just be forgetten. I feel very empty of it all. Is that wrong to think? i've been wishing for this day for years. it's hear and i'm excited as hell for even tomorrow to be over. I don't write anymore. i really should. I'm not one to let things go unless there has been some sort of resolution and i think i've been holding on to far too many little agonizing problems. I don't feel a neccecity to write.. like writing is ultimatly not important, kind of a waste of time or a dumb way to express emotion. Heck, expression in itself seems less and less useful. Being who i was, whatever that was, seems like it's wrong. Who i truly am is wrong...there are easier, better ways to carry myself and my attitude. Fuck that. I am what i am.-Reebok advertising. I love a good quote, i love inspiration, admiration, sophistication, the ability to be unique and others accepting that. I love not taking it to heart when people offend you. I love not letting the littlest words get to me, making me feel like i'm not good enough. I love baseball and i love to write. I love art, both creating and observing everything it has to offer. I like music, i don't know how much i like playing it with the current circumstances. I love people up for a good time, i do not like those who try to make it their idea and draw attention to themselves in some way or another. Arrogance annoys the hell out of me. I hate the push and pull amongst friends, like some struggle for control when everyone should just be on the same level. I dislike that very much. I do not appreciate nor understand the contant neccecity to want what you can not have. I hate the fact that the thought of "wanting" even enters a person's head. Is there no respect for friendship? No common sense? I love me for who i am and the ability that i have, that everyone has, to express it through writing or some other sort. I'm not one to be hurtful. I'm not one to change for somebody. This can be a difficult compensatoin at times. I am what i am.. take it or leave it, i truly do not care. I found myself years ago.. the winter of tenth grade, then again in the winter of eleventh grade. Now all i am waiting for is the opportunity to get into the world and make something of what i already know i have. I am willing to sacrifice for those i care about. Those i care about want me to be happy. I already feel so much better just having stated all of this... Tomorrow is the last day of high school. Tomorrow is the LAST DAY OF HIGH SCHOOL. I want to feel that surge, just the flood gates opening, the coolest most refreshing water washing me up and never letting me go as i set that Physics final into mr. debruckyre's little vanilla colored box. I want that feeling of joy as i let myself fall into back into my chair, give the biggest sigh of relief and try to understand what finishing highschool has meant to me for so long... it's here...in the words of Jay Z, What more can i say? What i think and how i act are sometimes two very different things. i could talk too long about why that is and i'll spare the struggles behind that.

I'm leaving shortly to greet what will most likely be a very miserable and long night. I'm looking forward to it. We're heading to the highschool to set up camp in the parking lot. A storm's blowing in. i'm not real sure what's going to happen but like i said, i admire people up for a good time. I had a thought a few weeks back and that is this: Do as much as you can outside of your daily routine as possible. take hold of every unique opportunity that presents itself to you and for God's sake, do what you believe in.

well...a day after my last entry i got a letter in the mail from winona. two days after that janaye got the same letter. We're both in so off we go ha. It's kind of a strange feeling. I'm not feeling as much so excited as i am just happy that it's settled. Just such a relief, tired of waiting, tired of keeping it kind of hush just in case we weren't going to end up in the same place for some reason. and now the college process can finally continue onto something new.

i just told her i got accepted tonight, it's 2:03 am. just wanted to wait until she got in so there wouldn't be the stress of her having to wait... so ya told her tonight. I don't know though, i feel like i dropped the ball tonight. i told dan we'd make it over to brady's.. i wanted to go, she seemed like she wanted to go..just didn't i guess. it's an empty feeling, not coming through on something you say. should've at least called. And somone's apology can lose meaning fast if the problem doesn't go away so i'll use one here and say that i'm sorry we didn't make it to brady's.. this whole situation probably isn't even that big of a deal, it's just one of those things that gets under your skin and bugs the hell out of you. Guff. That's all it is. it annoys me.

That's really all i've got... but hey entries come in bunches, i'm kind of in the writing mood. I think that's because i have things that i'm more sure about that i can write about now. The whole winter prior to this past week has been basic uncertainty. i coulnd't write about anything because i didn't know how i actually felt about so many things and putting forth the effort would only be trying to force out some half-assed result. I have a grasp on life for the moment. I know i blew it tonight, but i'm understanding again. i'm really tired, this entry probably should've waited until noon tomorrow, just after i'd rolled out of bed and begun to enjoy a bowl of berry lucky charms. All's well though.. i'm looking forward to brady's tomorrow night.

i returned from my first ever visit to winona a couple hours ago. Just went with Janaye to spend time with her sister and kind of get away for a day. My mind is basically made up and all i'm waiting for now is the acceptence letter officially varifying my entry to winona st. university, and to finally have thrown open the door, exiting the fog to enter the future with a full head of steam. I'm ready for highschool to be complete. I'm ready for summer, to have fun, spend my time at work and at a lake all day. And when it's all over, i'm ready to just leave. I've been ready for longer than i've realized..longer than i've really grasped. I've been fed up with life for the vast majority of this school year. Mostly being home but that's been the same story for seventeen years, but just the drag of a highschool environment...'cliques,' lables, people just expecting you to be someone.. basically be a nobody unless given permission to act otherwise.. i've been itching to do what makes me happy since this school year has begun. I stated it very clearly in my entry pertaining to hutch football and my outtake on 'college life' and finding just that girl that i've been envisioning for too long if you may recall that entry. I want to be happy. I want to do things that make me happy. i want others, my friends or anybody, to do what makes them happy. I cannot fault them for that. I feel i've been put into a mold that people felt they had a grasp for. If i act out of my mold people become agitated or annoyed which is selfish on their part in my opinion. I think i'm breaking out of it. A lot of others are too and this is a really great thing in my mind. I have no grudge of any sort at this point. I won't hold one for long if i do. I'm excited for the future. my future. I'm not looking forward to leaving my frinds behind. who in their right mind would be looking forward to that? I'm just tired of waiting..waiting for anything, anybody. Just ready to tackle a life that seems to have been leaving me short for so long, and there's nothing but positives to look ahead to. And being left short doesn't pertain to friends or anything like that. I couldn't really ask for anything more in that regard. There's always that line between friends and janaye now. I wish i could be in two places at once. I can't obviously. i'm more than happy with whichever way my days go. I guess if i can't make everybody happy than so be it.. i do want to do both. I've had my little heart set on her since the ninth grade, straight through absolutly everything with courtney, and it's certainly not slowing down any now and it's exciting. she makes me happy. it's exciting that she is looking very closly at winona which means it won't be forced to end. i don't know what will happen but right now i dont want it to stop with her so i have no reason to not remain optimistic. I beleive that if people pursue what they truly want, the right result will come of it, and whether or not its what they expected, they will be happy with the result. i really have no idea where i'll be in 5 years..a few weeks ago i would have been alright skipping all five of them and coming out the otherside whereever it may be..i'm getting a taste of what it may look like..what my shape my future. I'm not ready to start my life over but i couldn't be looking more forward to finally being able to shape it for myself.

alright i've got to work quickly here, matthew has made a deal with me stating i must create a livejournal while he prepares himself a meal fit for an nfl offensive line. my conditions were that i'd type until the video i'm downloading from google is completed. It's at about 55% right now so time's a tickin..

it's a mudvayne video, the song 'dig' from ozzfest a while ago. brady has the video on his computer and the first time he showed it to me it scared the living daylights out of me, but at the same time watching it was very appealing to me so i don't know i'm trying to get it. I can't download from a program on my computer but i don't take the time to install a program that'll do it and i just recently discovered the joys of google video where entire concerts are accessable at my own discretion.

Tonight was kinda cool. Suschi at danielle's cabin which was disgusting...funny rice wrapped in kelp with veggies and smothered in seemingly poisounous sauce. not too pleasing. some nice hot tubbing too with hair frozen to extremes. pretty basic night other than that i suppose. ohhh boot hocky on cowger's lake was a bast. If we could do more of that, i think that'd be pretty dang cool.

i got asked to sadie hawkins today. kind of saw it coming i suppose..would kind of hope that my girlfriend would ask me....it's kind of cool saying she's my girlfriend..i dunno it's janaye. still seems kind of strange if i'm looking at it in the perspective of when i was in like tenth grade and have a mongo crush on her ever since...but anyways, we were all out at meuleners putting together the typical jam session and brady gets a phone call, leaves the room, comes back in and says that it looks like someone 'got my car' or something. so we mosey on out and sure enough, i see some debree dangling from my doors and such. upon further investigation i find that the debree is an onslaugt of colorful streamers and the enitre inside of my car is packed to the extreme with those huge rubber almost yoga ball deals with all sorts of colorful little ones scattered about as well. On my window was a note stating: i finally got the balls to ask you to the dance. will you to sadie hawkins with me. ohh janaye...she and dani really did it up nice, and of course i said yes and now i have 15 big ol' balls sitting in my room, luckily she plans on returning them, using the excuse that they weren't bouncy enough for her likings..she's something else, i tell ya what. gotta love it.

Pretty interestin day i suppose. the rest of the weekend was a lot of working which was really enjoyable as well. if i have to spend 8 1/2 hours working til 1 in the morning, i'm glad that it's in a place like that.

Quite a bit has gone down since my last entry recapping duluth. mosty with janaye i spose which is probably why i don't do the livejournal deal much anymore.. kind of personal i suppose and i don't mean that in the way some people are probably thinking. if i did a lot of journals they'd just be about typical thoughts any schmo has after getting his 'dream girl' so i guess that's my justification. i have other places to write about that sort of stuff.

i hope that before i leave college i can organize everything i've written on my own by date and everything. Print out every livejournal, compile tid bits of poems or thoughts in school notebooks, take apart other notebooks in my room, and organize all of it neatly into one monster binder that from that point i can just keep adding to. Basically write my memoirs as i go through life so when i've moved on from the world people can still get a clear and more complete understanding of who i was and what i was about...not just remember the trivial knowledge of my accomplishments. And it 50-60 years, i think reading about myself now will be so enjoyable; basically sit and wonder what on earth i was thinking and how i ever could have thought so much about such small issues...just sort of laugh about it. that's my plan i spose.

you guys are getting extra though, my video wrapped up about ten minutes ago, it's 3 am and i want to go to bed. good old o.a.r. it really is 2:59am right now though..i'm hitting the sack. Grateful dead is pretty cool. have a good night.

December 14, 2006
DuLuTh, MiNnEsOtA, and we're on our way

Well first to set the scene, the original plan for the trip was janaye, casey, and a parent. i asked if i could go, was invited and from there brady worked his way in but backed down when he found out the college visit was full on friday. so it's janaye, casey, and myself. I'm sitting at work wendesday night and i get a text from brady saying 'guess who's playing in duluth thursday night' This meant trampled, isn't that obvious? this also means that brady is now going with again and that we would get to spend the night in duluth thursday then go to the visit friday afternoon. is shibby the right word?

So thursday evening I'm picked up by casey, who had never been to duluth, and brady. we head to casey's house to meet up with janaye and drop off casey's ride. We all pile into janaye's suburban, her driving, myself shotgun, and the other two misfits set up shop in the back seat. We hit the road around 5:30, having to be in duluth and at pizza luce's by 9:00 so we'd be plenty early for the trampled show.

The drive was fun. Is that a good sentence? Anyways, mostly consisted of heavy rock then the music slowly shifted towards janaye's mixed cds with the classic 70s and 80s jams as night set on and everyone knew every word. Some rocking out was done and we made great time on the interstate with janaye clocking a cool 80 for most of the trip. We make the final turn around the bend of I-35 and the cit is upon us down below. And there's just that feeling you get as we made our way down the hill, the roads and everything were still so familiar from our trip there this summer, and there is just a sense of joy and relaxation that you can't stop from taking over you. The city will just make you happy, and now look at the three other people in the car with me, especially the one who's driving, the timing of our little escape from hutchinson could not have been any better.

the time is just before 9:00, we made it there in under 3 1/2 hours, and we made our way to luce's much easier this time around than in the summer. We took a left at Superior and Lake Street, went up a block and parked in the same ramp as always because there are no attendants and you can always get out without paying.

We walk inside to sit down and there are hippies everywhere, pretty typical i spose but still not something we're used to. We sit down and order up some sort of shrimp pizza, the first of some strange meals to come. After the food we chilled and just bs'ed for a long time watching everyone with beards, beanies, and dreadlocks wonder around. Oh, trapped in the 50's guy was there. Real black dingy hair, thick lensed glasses, sitting at his own table in the middle of everyone rocking out to the beatles. It was his 60's counterpar to a t.

the opening band, which was a complete gong show, finally came to the stage. They didn't start til about 10:45 so we already knew we were in for a long night. To get a good idea of what these guys were like, they just finished recording a children's album and the band consisted of guitar, a banjo, and the mongo chello bass. These three guys were you're typical steves from blue's clues. But then there was the washboard player. I think we gave sparby three years until his beard would be as long as this guy's and luke would look identical to him. This washboard player, simply put, was the man. He just let it all hang loose in the back of the stage with his one washboard beat.

Trampled took the stage around midnight, seemed like a repeat of the chili peppers following dismal mars volta performance. At this point it was getting kind of late and we began to wonder if we'd find a place to sleep tonight because nobody bothered to make any hotel reservations before we left. But the bass started to pound and the turtles were goin nuts so we soon forgot our sleeping issues. They played a lot of new stuff that was unfamiliar which sucked in a way but still, they're new cd comes out in february and from the sound of the show, it's going to rock a lot harder than their previous two. Janaye felt right at home with the hippie crowd and their free spirit dancing haha and as brady put it, casey didnt stop bobbing his head from the time we left hutch until 2:00am when the turtles finally finished their last song. An awesome two hour set. The washboard player even jammed in a few songs with him. I have no idea how he knew how to play all of their songs.. ha The show was well worth coming up a night early though, the place was packed, everyone was going nuts. We were standing front row for the entire second set which makes watching those guys pluck and pop their intruments all the most exciting to watch. The best part of the whole show was when the guitar player snapped his string. The rest of the band didn't miss a beat when he stopped to restring it, just went into an extended bridge like they'd done it a million times which they actually probably have. But he strings it and gets it tuned as the rest of the band starts getting faster and harder and in the most perfect split second timing between finishing the re-stringing process and the start of the chorus he came absolutly ripping into the song and the place erupted, janaye was groovin with a dude with a monster beard and looked like jarred 'fubu' athey, casey is bobbin away, witt and i are like HOLY SHIT!! and if it weren't for the rest of the night, that moment would have made the trip.

We make our way into the duluth night a little after 2:00am and are too jived up to try finding a place to stay so we head down to the lift bridge all lit up and hovering over the channel. Just strolled across the bridge and headed down the peir to the spot where we saw the cops drag some drunkies out of the bushes in the summer. The night was growing chilly, there was no snow on the ground but still we were in duluth in december in sweatshirts at two in the morning. We got back in the burbon and drove down superior street looking for a place to eat. A flouresant OPEN sign snagged my eye and janaye near e-braked a u-turn and parked outside of a little place called Kinecke's. ohh kiecke's... Little mexican shop with a lady and guy taking the orders and making food, giving you tortilla chips in a small brown paper bag and basically a platter of cheese, beans, lettuce, peppers, and other fixings. The place was 'sketchy' but we were 'hungry' and didn't mind, all the while wondering what the folk in hutch were doing on this thursday school night evening...but now that our hunger was satisfied, we needed a place to sleep, otherwise it'd be a cold cramped night in the back of a suburban in a dark parking lot.

Well...believe it or not, i'd say this is about the halfway point of our little adventure and since brady needs help with his new ipod, i'm gonna take a break. Check back shortly for the rest of the trip, i'll just tack it on to the end of this. Hope you all had a merry christmas and lets enjoy this winter vacation.

Ok i'm back, it's 12:54 am of the same day..picking up where i left off..

When we were at the trampled show we saw kirsten's brother jordan. we told him of our sleeping situation and he informed us of a place just down the road from the restaurant so there we were, 3:00am in duluth on a friday morning checking into this dingy piece of sleep called the Voyaguer Inn...Brady and Casey were too scared to come inside or something and Janaye was the only one old enough and i guess responsible enough to check out a room. So i went with her inside and this creeper of a guy helped her with the paper work to room 106. He made it very clear that we were to make no noise, assuming we were the typical drunk as skunk punks looking for a place to booze and party for the night. The place wasn't all that bad expect every room was doored outside so basically any freak on the street could smash down our door if need be. oh and the employee of the month picture featured a rambunctious little chimpanzee.

So after stepping over the black bra laying in the parking lot we made our way inside...a lot of chiling was done...casey and brady were crammed into a bed probably fit for one, fingers were fadangling everywhere...janaye and i got the other bed of course. Pretty much just laughed it up, chilled and were tired as anything for the next hour or so.. Thumbing through the cable tv we came across some public access psychodelic channel which was basically a kelidoscope on tv with some seagulls and trippy music..this managed to knock out casey and brady for a while, but i don't know, guess i wasn't too tired. But i got the chance to really get a grasp for the scene, let me paint the picture for you..

I am four hours away from home in Duluth, MN in a dingy hotel room, it is past four o'clock in the morning, tired and extremly disoriented because of that, just finished a trampled by turtles show and downed some kineke's, there is an acid trip taking place on tv with brady out cold and casey snoring like a bear beside him. I am fortunate enough to have Janaye laying in bed next to me... i don't know, just a great situation to be in and a great time to be alive really.. This little lapse was interupted by a "What the hell?" from brady as he awoke from his grizzly's grunts and before you know it, the hotel room is alive and kicking once again.

Brady and Casey leave the room for some fresh air, come back, turn up the rap videos on mtv 2, lay awake for what seemed like forever talking about who know's what..all i remember is some 'would you rather' talk..who knows, but janaye and i finally fell asleep and they followed shortly after, probably stretching towards 5:00am

I'll speed day two up a bit. We woke up at 10:45, checkout was at eleven..janaye took a shower, us other three managed to lock ourselves out of the room in that ammount of time..but we picked up our sweatshirts since we had no luggage and made checkout just in time. Went and got some perkins for breakfast, cruised the streets to kill time because our visit wasn't until 2:00. Went to 'the last place on earth' again. the equivalent of a hutchinson pipe dreams but to the extreme because it was in duluth.

visit was alright..mostly side jokes of the don vito lookin guy's chest hair and the lady guiding the tour. i don't think any of us were really in the college visit sort of mood. The school is huge though, aimed moreso on learning than campus life i guess is a way to put it. Like brady said, you'd find more brainiacs in duluth than some other places. but i don't want to go for the school, i'm in it for the city..We made a pretty good time out of our time we had there, four greasy schmucks with no parents with us.

the visit topped off our trip and it was straight home after we got out of there. the ride home was nice, mostly conversation with the driver for the first half then i took over at the wheel and everyone started loosening up again. jamming once again took over the suburban and we cruised our way back into hutch to finish off this much needed getaway. Nothing went wrong, things went better than i expected, more than i could've hoped for or planned for, another basically perfect trip to the city was in the books with a new cast of definatly enjoyable friends.

Wendland is out. Kevin is in. Official now. Josh will make appearances for the songs he sins that we're going to keep, but other than that witt will be taking over on vocals. Time to basically start over. Was it safe to say that ready made and killing in the name were the best songs we played? is it weird that those were the two songs kev was in? It's time to cut the bullshit and make something of this past time we've developed. We're deffinatly in search of songs, any suggestions will be considered. like brady was saying though, finding an image is kind of what we're after. Right now i'd say there's no specific genre but we want to rock. Rage is what we're looking for. Fast chili peps, metalica, sabbath is what we're looking for. Perhaps phish and anything beyond that that has a heavy guitar and fast drum beat. I'll close the deal with any neccecary bump. Learning songs is now becoming very itrigueing, we're all finally starting to figure out the best way to put songs together as a whole. Kev, a second and more importantly a lead guitar player, has been what we were missing all along and his musical interest will certainly mix things up but it will offer a more powerful sound to what we do, i think. Still Floppin' isn't going to cut it...we have far more talent than that although the learning process along the way in preparation helped tremendously. and of course kevin. Time to start firing...here comes the rage.